January 5th, 2010

Shut in

It's not that I've anywhere I want to go, but, because I can't get out - even though I wouldn't want to if I could - I'm feeling shut in and a bit stir crazy.  Stupid really.  We should have hosted the Chadwick family party (my side) on Saturday but couldn't because of the weather.  This has left us eating potato hash (with real beef not corned beef) for several meals and my poor parents having to eat a huge trifle - they were bringing to the party.  My mum also had to eat a large amount of prawns she'd defrosted for the salmon en croute.

I thought I would take some pictures of the view from our windows.  poliphilo  is the talented photo taker in our family, but he doesn't seem to be able to be bothered so here's mine:

  a close up of the chain link fence at the back.

my poor buried car (the blue one).

my lift - only worked for about a dozen times in the last year!

The one thing these photos don't show is that it is still snowing.  And the papers are warning that we could be short of Gas soon due to all the extra being used.
  • Current Mood
    quixotic sort of gallic shrug time.

Trees - snowy of course

I often try to take photos of trees.  Their shapes are endlessly fascinating to me.  Here's a couple from this morning, majestic (and a bit spooky) in white.

our back yard
  • Current Mood
    contemplative pouf

Analogies and Metaphors

Analogies and Metaphorstaken from today's ArcaMax Jokes [ezines@arcamax.com]

These came from the annual "Dark and Stormy Night" competition. Actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays:

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.

18. Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

20.. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

26. Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.

27. She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.