August 12th, 2009

The next step for Tony

When Tony was ill recently it made us both think about or own - and each other's mortality.  I have always dealt with all the financial matters leaving Tony knowing nothing about it.  He has always had what is almost a phobia about numbers - and unfortunately finances are full of them.

Recently he's been cooking 'proper' meals from scratch, so the next step, which we decided on a few minutes ago, is that he will draw £50 a week from his account and that will have to buy all our groceries - plus cleaning stuff, toilet rolls, tissues etc., and put the petrol in the car.  I'll still see to the bank account and make sure all the bills are paid - most of which are on direct debit anyway.  So one small step into looking after the weekly cash should - I hope - take away a lot of the fear - which is, after all, only the fear of the unknown. 

The problem is that if I die then all our money dies with me.  Oh he'll get the mortgage paid, but all the money, except his carer's allowance - which is tied to looking after me, is because I'm sick/disabled.  I also know that he'll not ask for financial help from anyone - I think he'd lose the house first.

 I don't think I could have suggested this a few months back.  Finding he CAN cook - which only means that his confidence has now caught up with his ability - has given him confidence in his abilities all round, I think.  He wasn't particularly daunted by the prospect of budgeting for us both, I'm glad, as I do worry over how he would cope etc., without me.  So much so that I've got my sister-in-law Ruth primed to look after him for me.

Mind you I hope it won't happen.
  • Current Mood
    hopeful hopeful