May 1st, 2009

(no subject)

I've just withdrawn from my Open University course. 

My reasons? -

I seem to have been walking round in the good old Fibro-fog - part of Fibromyalgia where your brain won't retain information - I suppose it's like when you've been awoken from a deep sleep and expected to think, answer questions etc. immediately.  At first it lasted a couple of hours, then a couple of days - weeks - now I seem to be on months.  I've felt like this for at least the last two months and it isn't showing any sign of clearing up.  I'm also very short on energy these days too - good old chromic fatigue syndrome (part of fibro - of course).

The course itself - I like art, including modern art - but this course was putting me off it.  When you read critics on literary matters - like Shakespeare - at least the writers can (usually) write pretty well, but these art critics seem mainly to write in cliches and gobbldy-gook - why should I have expected someone who understands a painting or a photograph's better qualities to be able to write clearly about it?  Because I have to read the stuff.  Also my tutor sniffs and coughs all the time - and I'm noise sensitive too (thank you fibro!).

Also I've been having problems with my eyes since well before Xmas.  They are dry and itchy and I've had a couple of infections in them.

How do I feel about it? -

Sad not to get an honours degree - I'm going to accept my BA - as unless my health improves out of all proportion I won't go back to the OU.

Relieved - I've been struggling so much.  I've read everything - and more - and can't remember any of it.

I think there is also so much new stuff going on in our lives - Church, Ourdert, Peter and Fabrizio and our other friend from Church that we're helping - that I want to have some energy for them.  Also I'm still into Shakespeare.  We've already been to 1 RSC production and have another 2 to go to, an Open University Shakespeare Society open day and we're going to Lenny Henry as Othello in Halifax next week.


I also want to see my stepsons and stepdaughter more - and visit Tony's family - and I just don't have much energy.

Ah well.  Life moves on - and I'm still happy with my life.

As of April 29th Tony and I have been together 18 years.  All from answering his ad in the local newspaper!!

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